This past weekend marked the 13th year since my oldest brother John went home to be with the Lord. Time doesn’t make the memories fade, nor does time dissolve the grief that wades. My family and I rejoice where he is however, because we are going toward the same eternal destination—but pain is still felt with every longing breath for him. And this relationship between joy and pain has me thinking.

You see, is it pain because he is not where we are? Or pain because we are not where he is? One pain tries to pull down, which pushes joy away. While the other pain pulls up, and pain that pulls up gives way to joy.

I tell you the truth, wanting him back in this world would be ripping peace and joy away from him, and pulling down what God allowed--pulling down pain at joy's expense. In fact, when we try to take back what God took, we are actually saying that we know better than the One who wrote our names in the Lamb’s book. And that Book of Life only exists because God gave us His only begotten Son. 

And that very gift is the reason why we can be thankful in God’s taking, knowing that the person taken is only honoring their heavenly reservation. And not even a second too late. Eternal joy then is in fact a date.

So we pull ourselves up through pain in order to keep going towards God’s joy. Yes we miss John. Yes his daughter Alivia, now 13, will never know her daddy in person. And yes my parents buried a son. But none of these pains were allowed without first passing through the scarred hands of the Son—“Who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross” (Hebrews 12:2).